Thursday, January 17, 2013

Mommy Guilt :(

My child loves the babysitter more than she loves me or so it seems sometimes.

I came home from work the other day. After LONG 11 hours away from Aly. I missed her SO MUCH! All I wanted was to see her and get a big hug (its her new thing). Maybe a kiss and a smile.

Instead what I got was a dirty look while she ran to the arms of her babysitter. Outwardly I tried to laugh it off.

(inside, mommy heart broken)

She gave Miss K hugs and kisses. And screamed at me when I tried to pick her up. She ran after Miss K as she tried to leave, clinging to her leg and crying, then banging on the door screaming her name after she left. All the while I was trying to console her while wishing and hoping that she would want me as much as she wanted the baby sitter.

It was not to be.

The rest of the night she remained upset with me. DH had to feed her dinner and get her ready for bed. Because she could not even LOOK at me without screaming. She wanted NOTHING to do with me. And I was so sad :(


We all went to sleep and I had the most horrible night of sleep ever. No more than 1 hour at a time.


But in the morning the most wonderful thing happened. DD woke up and started calling for me from her crib. "Mommy! Momm....Mommm.....Mommy!! I went to get her and she had a HUGE smile on her face!! She reached out her arms to me and said "HI, mommy!! I la you!"


*mommy heart melted*

I love my baby :) It sucks that I have to be away from her for so long each day. But I do it so that I can provide financially for our family. And I know my daughter loves me :) And I am glad she loves her baby sitter so much. I couldn't have asked for a more sweet and perfect person to take care of my little one while I have to be away. I am glad they have such a great relationship. DD can only benefit from having more people in her life that love her so much.

3 comments:

  1. Its hard but be glad you have someone who loves her and that she loves to keep an eye when your not there. And sometimes you just hit a moment when they are not ready for transition right then...it happens....wait til she goes to kindergarten and never looks back

    Your child will always love your more than any caretaker no worries about that!

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  2. This is what I'm worried about once the babies are aware they are in daycare all day - that they will prefer them to me! But I'm also looking forward to their smiles when I go to pick them up every day. and I know they will be in good hands, just like Aly is!

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  3. No one will EVER replace you as Mommy! Even if it seems like she wants someone else, the truth is that she will always come running back to you. :) You are such a great mom and doing so much for your family. Don't let anyone ever suggest differently!

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