Jaydon Thomas was born early yesterday afternoon. 6lbs 4oz and 18" long. He's a tiny little peanut like his sister was :)
We got to the hospital at 6am for our induction appointment. They got us checked into a delivery room and started the pitocin around 7:15am. We settled in thinking this would take awhile. I was really concerned an induction would take longer than my previous labors, especially since we were booting Jaydon out a couple weeks early, and I wanted to do everything I could to avoid that.
I already knew I would get a epidural at some point, so I signed the consent forms and the nurse said to let her know when I was ready for it. Knowing I could "tap out" whenever I needed to, I tried to work with the medicine and contractions as much as possible to help labor progress. Since I wasn't allowed to walk due to the monitoring for Jaydon, I stood by the side of the bed or used a yoga ball to help keep myself as upright as possible through the contractions. As the contractions became stronger, I started to focus more and breathe through them. No moaning or crying - no noises at all. I was zeroed in on the task at hand and seriously focused. At about 11 I had enough and asked for the epi so I could rest for awhile.
I could still feel the pressure of the contractions, but the epi took away the pain. I laid back and tried to rest for awhile. I watched the heart rate monitor as my contractions came and went and quickly figured that Jaydon had the cord around his neck. His heart rate got lower and lower as the contractions got stronger. The nurse also noticed his heart rate from the monitors, and she came in and rolled me to my side to help relieve the pressure on him. The movement was enough to move him into position, though, and I told the her that he was ready. After checking to confirm, she called the doctor and we were ready to go!
While they were all getting ready, I started to panic and cry. This was it. This was the finish line. Would he come out crying? Was he OK? Flashbacks of Aubree's completely silent birth crashed over me as I sobbed. But I quickly willed myself into composure and focused even more than I had before. I don't really remember much of the commotion around me. The nurse told me I could do a couple of practice pushes and I think my body just took over. I didn't make a sound - just breathed through the pressure and focused on strong, even, controlled pushes. The doctor joked that she was having a hard time knowing what I was doing because I wasn't talking or making any indication that I was in pain. In the last two pushes the heart rate monitor on Jaydon went completely silent. And then he was out at 12:53 - just over five and a half hours from the time we started!
He had the cord around his neck once and was very purple - and not crying. The doctor started to clean him off and he began to fuss a bit. No strong cries, but he was making sounds!! They laid him on me and continued to clean him up. As soon as I started talking to him he was quiet again :) I think I got my wish for a cuddly baby. He's very content as long as he's being held, and he prefers to have momma holding him.
Jaydon means "God has heard." Every tear along the way. Every fear - rational or not. Every time I dared to hope that things would be OK this time. And every time I cried from guilt because I knew Jaydon wouldn't be here if Aubree still was. We reached the finish line of the longest trial we've endured so far. Nine months of dancing between grief, joy, fear, and loss of innocence.